One of the things God has really called me to be on this blog is be AUTHENTIC. I feel like when I have a bad day, He wants me to tell you I have had a bad day - don't sugar coat it, don't pretend, don't act like I don't have any problems.Don't tell everyone everything is rainbows and sunshine and then close my blinds and fall apart as long as no one is looking. I have cancer for goodness sake, there is just a new REALITY here that I must face.
In turn, when I am REJOICING for the simplest thing - He wants me to share that too. He wants me to tell you that I am GRATEFUL to just be alive, to take this very breath and I don't care if I lose every hair on my head, I really don't. It is such a small price to pay for the reward He is giving me. He wants me to tell you how this, and every other hard time I have gone through has CHANGED me forever and that there is no going back to the person I was before. I don't even remember who that person was as it seems to have been a lifetime ago. I feel that He is telling me that I must BE REAL at all times and by being real, I am REALLY BEING. Yes, I am broken all of the time but in my brokenness He is GLORIFIED. Yes, I cry and feel sorry for myself from time to time but HE has accounted for every single one of my tear and in my selfishness he brings me to a whole new level of really being for Him and Him alone. A whole new level of FAITH and a whole new level of SURRENDERING it all to Him.
I don't know what this means to you, maybe nothing or maybe everything. Only God can speak these things into your heart as they need to be spoken.
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