One Word: Dread

So I have to admit - I am absolutely dreading tomorrow. Chemo #9....

With being sick this last week I feel like I just had my last chemo treatment and then all of the sudden it is time for another one. Yet, I am not ready. I have things to do, people to see, places to go....toilets to clean....anything but having chemo.

This is where the going gets tough. I must get my big girl boots on and place one foot in front of the other. Soon I will be at the end. I have 6 weeks and 1 day until my last treatment. (Side note: my birthday is actually 6 weeks from today. I have never really cared whether my birthday came or not - at least not in my adult years - but this year I am excited for it to come because that means I will be at the end.) Anyway, 6 weeks and 1 day from today I will be having my last treatment and it can't get here fast enough.

I will have 4 treatments in 6 weeks (3 of them being in June). If I can survive June I can survive anything!

Making it even harder - Jason is leaving tomorrow morning for a mission trip. This was all planned when we thought I would only have 8 treatments - God had different plans though. I will miss Jason dearly. He takes such good care of me and puts up with my whining. It will definitely be a challenge without him. My mom is stepping in while he is gone and the kids are so happy to have grandma here.

So, where do you go when you are dreading something - the bible of course.

Psalm 27:1 (Amplified Bible)

[A Psalm] of David.

 ¹THE LORD is my Light and my Salvation--whom shall I fear or dread? The Lord is the Refuge and Stronghold of my life--of whom shall I be afraid?

Priceless Moments: Father, Son & the Great Dilemma

When I was going through the pictures from Kearyn's birthday party (don't worry - I will be sharing them as we go along) I found these pictures and just loved them.

It truly is the great dilemma. You can just hear their conversation -

Daddy: So Creide, what do you think - should we go over the shoot and through the windmill or take the safe shot and go around?

Creide: Daddy! Look, there is a bird! Come here birdy, birdy, birdy - I'm gonna catch it.

Daddy: No Creide, we are playing golf here. We need to decide how we are going to play this hole.

Creide: Come here birdy. Awe Daddy! The birdy flew away!

Daddy: We'll just play it safe and go around.

Creide: Okay Daddy - look! A squirrel! 

......or something like that. :-)

~Pictures by Sarah B.~

Happy Birthday Baby Girl!!!

Kearyn Jaedance is ONE!

I cannot believe that a full year has gone by since the Lord brought you into our lives. We have done our very best to soak up each and every moment - even when times have been so incredibly hard. 

Your precious smile has kept us all going - a welcome distraction from the challenges we face. 

It has been a joy to watch your brothers discover the true meaning of what it means to be a "big  brother". They continually lay down their own will and desires for you - their baby sister. At one time these boys didn't know the meaning of being gentle but now they better not dare do anything to hurt you - accident or not - as they will surely face the wrath of the other two. 

I have watched your daddy turn from this rough-tough man to a pile of goo for his baby girl. You still look so small when he holds you in his arms. And he even puts bows in your hair. 

You have changed me as well. I once thought I could only be a "boys mom" and you have shown me that I have what it takes to be a mom to you as well. You have given me that much more to live for and that much more to keep fighting for. There have been so many nights when I have just sat and stared at your precious face and that has given me the strength I have needed to press on, to fight the good fight, and to never give up. 

There are so many things about this first year that you will never know and thankfully will never remember. But you will know the love that you have been so abundantly given by so many. That you will carry with you for a lifetime. 

Thank you baby girl for being you. 


Thank you God for giving her to us. She has truly changed our lives forever. I cannot imagine living life without her. 






~Photos by Sarah B.~ 

Kearyn 5: My Best Memorial Day Memory

First and foremost, the Gressman family wants to say thank you to all who have served our country so bravely and honorably. We know that we would not know the freedoms that we have today if it weren't for your sacrifices. For those of you who are currently serving  - we pray for you often as well as for the loved ones who support you.

As I was thinking about Memorial Day I started to think about my favorite Memorial Day memory. Well hand down it was Memorial Day of 2010 and it was the birth of my baby girl. Yes, it was quite the Memorial Day for our family - a memory that we can never forget. A perfect day - Kearyn's Day.

Mommy and Kearyn ~ only minutes old

What is your favorite Memorial Day memory? Comment here, email me, or Facebook me and I will post it here - anonymously if preferred.

Kearyn 4: How much does this daddy love his little girl?

Jason is a wonderful father (husband too but that isn't the focus of this post). He is an incredible father to our three boys - and there is no doubt that he is teaching them daily on how to become the men that God is calling them to be.

But then God threw us this curve ball.......her name is Kearyn Jaedance and she has these big greenish-brown eyes and these eyelashes - most importantly.....she isn't afraid to use them - boy does she use them. She uses them on her brothers - then she turns this secret power onto her daddy and he caves like a big pile of mush. She tries to use them on me but my super-mom powers (that and the fact that I am a girl too) totally deflect the puppy dog-eye/fluttering eyelash lethal combo.

There is no doubt that this daddy loves his girl. But the true question is how much does he love his girl? There are no words...... but maybe a picture or two will give you an idea.

This daddy loves his girl so much that he will eat cake with no hands.
What is a little frosting on the face after all. 

This daddy loves his girl so much that he will even wear a bow in honor of his baby girl at her 1st birthday party. Now that is true love.

God bless all of the daddy's in the world who sit cross legged and

 have afternoon tea parties with their little girls. 

God bless the daddy's who patiently brush the tangles from their little girl's hair

 and try their best to put pigtails in - even if they aren't quite even. 

God bless the daddy's who painfully enter their little girl's closets

even though all the ruffles and bows can be quite intimidating. 

God bless all of the daddy's who try their best to pick out "matching outfits" - 

after all, all shades of pink go together, right? 

God bless the daddy's who teach their little girls to dance by allowing them to stand on their big daddy feet - 

not at all minding the scuff marks left by her favorite pair of princess shoes 

because he knows that someday he will be dreaming of the day 

that she was small enough to leave those scuff marks.

God bless the daddy's who don't mind going to jail for a very long time in order to protect his little girl. This commitment is only enhanced in the teen years and especially strong during events such as Homecoming and Prom. 

God bless the daddy who unselfishly walks his little girl down the aisle and

 "gives her away" to the man she loves.  

~God Bless the Daddy's by Andrea Gressman~ 

***Photos by Sarah B. - thank you Sarah for capturing these precious memories. *** 

Checking In.... Yes, I am Still Alive

So, I have started to get some concerned emails, etc. about how I am doing. You all know me so well - when I am not blogging that is generally because I am not feeling good. :-) And this time you would be correct.

I have been struggling with some respiratory junk and they are now putting me on antibiotics to try to have me over it before my next Chemo treatment on Wednesday. I am praying that I get over it by then as well. Even though I dread the treatments I long for the conclusion of all of this and don't want to postpone things - not even by one week. But God's timing is the perfect timing.

While I have a little energy today I am trying to get all of Kearyn's birthday stuff finalized as we are having her party tomorrow!

Thank you all for your love and support. As always, I am grateful!

Chemo #8

So, today I had treatment #8...... the funny thing is - like there is something funny about chemo - but I keep forgetting how many treatments I have had. I have to keep reminding myself. That is a clear sign that you have had too many treatments. LOL!

There are four more to go. Four seems so much more manageable than 5 doesn't it? Maybe it is just me.

I pretty much crashed when I got home today. I usually do okay on my treatment day and have a real hard time the Thursday, Friday, and Saturday after treatment but this treatment seems to be different. What am I saying? They have all been different. Not one has been the same.

Don't get me wrong, I am doing okay. Hey, I'm alive! That is good news right there - just super tired and trying to get a handle on the side effects.

I know I am dreadfully behind on my blogging but God has just been doing so many amazing things right now. First the Laundry Love Project this past week and then He has just been presenting ministry opportunity after ministry opportunity. I am doing my best to pay attention and trying to keep up!

I will keep you all updated over the next few days on how I am doing. I appreciate all of your prayers. There is a light at the end of the tunnel and I do see it. It is starting to burn brighter now and before you know it we will be there.

Love to all!
Andrea

Laundry Love Praise Report

I am sorry I am so late in providing this update. This has just been a super busy past few days but I did want to update you all as I know many of you contributed to Laundry Love monetarily and prayerfully.

First of all, we just feel so blessed to have been able to be apart of this project. We provided laundry services for around 20-25 people that were in the homeless program at the hotel. It was amazing to visit with these individuals and just learn their story. We made some great new friendships and we plan on doing this again on a monthly basis as it is an ongoing need. I will keep you posted on the next date and time. If you are interested in serving please feel free to contact me.

Thank you again for all the love, support, and prayers that you gave. We truly couldn't have done it without you. In the next couple of weeks I will be providing more detail on how we specifically helped certain people so stay tuned for that.

Blessings and love to all!

~Andrea

Update on Laundry Love...

Hello everyone! I just wanted to give you and update on the Laundry Love project that will be happening tomorrow. I just got word that 66 people (30 families) are pre-registered to come down and get their laundry done. 

First of all, thank you to all of my readers who have donated money towards this cause as well as hygiene products, laundry supplies, and for those of you who have volunteered as well! It has been truly overwhelming to see God work through all of you -especially in such a short time. We feel so encouraged. 

If there are still people out there who would like to contribute just let me know and I will give you the contact information. We will be at Southside Laundry from 10am-2pm this Saturday. Since we are serving so many people we are still in the need of more quarters. If we could raise another $100 in quarters I think we will be covered. So, it is time to clean out your couch cushions (I always seem to find a couple dollars in change in their!), check the console in your car, and anywhere else quarters seem to be hanging out. 

We hope to be able to continue the Laundry Love project for as long as their is a need in this community so all donated items will continue to be used. Jason and I have also be praying about starting this project in nearby communities - possibly partnering with another ministry to help us get things coordinated as well as keeping it running. I am thinking that will be pursued post chemo unless God calls us to do it early as He did this time. We are just open and willing to serve wherever the Lord calls us to. 

We also have had a few donations so that we will be able to provide a lunch for the families as well. I am grateful that we will be able to do this as I am excited for this time of fellowship. If you have supplies that you would be willing to donate for the lunch we would be grateful - paper plates, napkins, drinks, etc. If you would like to drop off some cookies for dessert - whatever God lays on your heart. 

Please keep us all in prayer and especially the families that are in need. 

God bless you all - thanks for reading, thanks for caring, and thanks for praying. 

Love to all,

Andrea

There is a Need! .....Please Read

Dear Friends,

I am not sure if you heard or not but last week there was a fire in my community at a local hotel that housed many of the homeless families in our community. As if being homeless wasn't hard enough this created an even greater hardship on these families. They have been left without clothing, hygiene products, and the list goes on and on.

One of their most immediate and basic needs is actually being able to get their laundry done as the laundry facilities were destroyed as well. There are around 90 people that are without these services - around 20-25 families. They need your help.

Think about how critical doing their laundry is for these families. There is the very basic need for good hygiene  of course but this helps them maintain employment, find new employment by being able to have fresh clean clothes for interviews, not to mention the benefits to the children to have clean clothes as well!

A year and a half ago Jason and I were able to participate in a project called "Laundry Love". We went to East Colfax in Denver, CO to do the laundry of some of the homeless people there. This was an amazing experience for us and we have been praying for the past year and a half that God would allow us to bring this project to our own community. When I read a Facebook post from my dear friend Autumn regarding the needs of these families I knew that it was time to bring Laundry Love to our community to help these families.

The concept is a simple one - we will meet this Saturday at a laundry mat here in town and we will do the laundry for any of these people that show up to have their laundry done.

In order to make this happen we do need your help. Here are just a few ways you can contribute:

• We need laundry detergent. 
• We need quarters. (This is one of the few ministry opportunities where quarters do count!) Go through your change jar or buy a roll a quarters. Truly - if you can give $5 you are giving a family a load of clean fresh laundry. What an incredible gift!) 
• Hygiene Kits - I would love to see separate hygiene kits for men, women, and children. Some of the items that you could donate: toothbrushes, toothpaste, shampoo, conditioner, body wash, razors, shaving cream, feminine products, combs, brushes, etc. 
• They also need clothing of any shape and size. 
• Toys may also be a need as well. I think having coloring books, crayons and some smaller toys might be nice for the little ones as we help mom and/or dad do their laundry. 

We are shooting to have this happen THIS SATURDAY! So, if you have anything that you can give in order to help these families please let me know. You can respond by leaving me a comment here, leaving a comment on my FB page if you are a friend of mine there, or you can email me directly. You can also talk with Jason at the church too. The important thing is that you let us know how you want to contribute and we will connect with you on how to make that happen. 

For all my out-of-town friends if you want to help out by sending a donation let me know. I am working on PayPal account that will be set-up just for this. If you are interested in contributing that way let me know and I will get you the info. If you want to mail a $5 Wal-mart gift card for detergent that is totally fine. If you want to send a check to the church that is very appreciated as well. 

If everyone can give just $5 we can make this happen! 

As we get things finalized you can check back here for more info. If you give me your email address I will put you on the email list for updates as well! 

Bless you all and thank you in advance for your help! 

~Andrea

Chemo #7.....Blah

On Wednesday I had my 7th chemo treatment. It is hard for me to believe that I have been through this 7 times now. I think it is kind of been a blur...obviously a gift from God to minimize all of the pain I have endured.

I had someone ask me the other day what chemo was like and I was really caught of guard by that. At the time I had gone through 6 treatments and that was honestly the first time someone had asked me that question. I was totally unprepared and ended up giving a terrible answer I am sure but the question has been swirling around in my mind every since. I would love to find a way to describe what it is like so that people can have a real sympathy for it - not for me - but for your neighbor, friend, and family member. Everyone seems to know someone close to them that has cancer, gone through cancer, or will go through cancer and I continually pray that the Lord will use my experience to help others. That He will use my words to articulate what it is all about so that maybe you have just a little clearer picture on what that special person in your life is going through and you can be there to support them in a way that maybe you didn't know possible before.

So what is chemo like? Now I am going to throw a wrench in the whole works and not give a direct answer - It is different for everyone. :-) I know, I know, how is THAT suppose to help you help anyone. Well, it doesn't. But let me go on......My chemo rolls around every other week which does not give me a whole lot of time to recover. I feel like I finally get to feeling well again and try to cram everything I need to do in just a few days and then it is time for another treatment. Others have chemo every three weeks, every week, once a month, and so on and so forth. It just depends on what type of cancer you have and what stage you are at.

Also, there are many different types of chemo. Evidently there are people who can just take a pill (where can you sign up for that option I would sure like to know) but for others it is done through an i.v. My chemo is pumped into me with an i.v. and as I have shared before, I have a port that creates easy access and saves my veins.

I get several drugs pumped into me during each chemo treatment. There is of course the pre-chemo cocktail as I like to call it. For everyone else in the planet it puts them into a nice nap. For me - not so much. I sit there wide awake while they continue to give me the 4 drugs that make up my chemo concoction. My plan is called the "ABVD" - (sounds like a new investment plan - I wish) and cleverly each of the letters represents one of the drugs. This is suppose to be the good stuff when it comes to kicking the Hodgkin's tail. I sure hope so.

As they inject my body with all of the stuff I don't really feel much most of the time. Sometimes I feel a bit nauseated for a few moments but that is generally something that last just for a few moments. I have had stomach cramps in the past and other funky side effects but those aren't the norm. I do know after sitting for several hours when I try to stand up my legs feel heavy and I do feel weak and that is the standard for me for the next few days.

My dear hubby kindly loads me up after chemo, takes me home, and puts me to bed. I don't feel good but I don't feel terrible at that point....just blah. Sometimes I have nausea in the evenings. I have to constantly keep something in my stomach or it gets worse. My palate is pretty limited on what sounds good now. I seem to associate everything that I use to like with the nausea and - you guessed it - the thought of that particular item makes me nauseous all over again and so it must be avoided.

I think I struggle with the nausea more than most do. You aren't really suppose to have nausea with chemo now-a-days. But I am on about 4 or 5 different nausea meds and I still struggle with it. Thursday morning is about the same as Wednesday. I just feel blah. I may be having hot flashes, etc.  but I am still able to cope pretty well. The hard part for me comes Thursday afternoon. 24 hours after chemo they give me a booster shot to help my immunity. I have heard that this can cause severe pain in people. It does cause me some discomfort but mostly it just completely knocks me out and I need to sleep a lot for the next few days. I do get some aches and pains along with it but to actually feel those I have to be coherent and most of the time after my shot I am not. I struggle with this for the next few days - usually Saturday, Sunday, and on into Monday. The times I am awake I feel uncomfortable pretty much all the time. I feel like my G.I. system is just completely shot. Everything burns when it goes down and everything causes me heartburn making it even worse. Pepto and Pepcid are close friends of mine now and they do an okay job of making the discomfort bearable.

I have done a great deal of research regarding chemo for Hodgkin's Lymphoma patients - for those who know me I know you are not surprised by this. I research everything. Anyway,  I have read multiple times that Hodgkin's Lymphoma patients should expect to feel tire 1-2 days a month - the days of their chemo. Anytime I read this I generally want to write whoever decided to put that little tid-bit of incorrect info a letter explaining what really happens and ask them where they got such information. And it isn't just me - I did consider the fact that I might just be a big baby about the whole chemo thing, I really did consider that - but I do know other patients with HL and even though they all do handle it differently and it doesn't affect us all the same, they are a bit more fatigued than just 1-2 days a month. So, if you happen to ever read that in all of the research I know you are doing on HL - just throw that concept out the window. I can tell you it is not true.

Anyway, that is my chemo in a nutshell. I am 3 days past now - dealing with heavy fatigue, the gross feeling of nausea on an off, and the feeling that my entire G.I. system is on fire but I am getting through it. For those of you who have been dying to know what my chemo is like (I am laying the sarcasm on super thick here) now you have finally found the answer and can cross that one off the list. You can move onto much more exciting things like how hang nails form or why men have the ability to actually think of "nothing".

Praying this finds all of you happy, healthy, and blessed,

~Andrea

A Month of Kearyn.....Day 3

What can you say about a little girl that I never thought I would have. I continually hear comments like "you finally got your girl" or "your dream finally came true". Neither of these statements are accurate. Jason and I did not just keep trying until we finally had a girl and I didn't lay awake at night dreaming about what it would be like to FINALLY have a little girl. I really didn't think about this at all to be honest with you. I personally think if I would have just laid around lamenting about not having a girl I would have been doing a huge injustice to my boys. God blessed me 3 wonderful boys and I celebrate that every day.

You see, I knew I always wanted four children. That had been laid on my heart long ago by the big guy upstairs. Beyond that I didn't care if I had 4 boys or 4 girls or 2 boys and 2 girls or any other combination that you can fit in there. I just wanted 4 children and I trusted God's wisdom to give me what He - and only He - knew our family needed. There is also another factor that contributed to this as well.....we have lost 5 babies due to miscarriage. After my first loss I stopped caring about whether or not I would have a boy or a girl and the desire to simply have a baby cradled in my arms only compounded with each and ever loss.

Am I glad God gave me a girl? I think the more appropriate response would be that I am grateful that God gave me Kearyn. He gave us the exact baby that needed to be in our family and she happens to be a girl. It is so amazing to think of how He so thoughtfully pieced our family together - it was like a puzzle and each of my children provided a key piece to that puzzle. Without one of them - the puzzle wouldn't be complete but together they have created a beautiful masterpiece - a reflection of Christ.

{Andrea & Kearyn ~ 5 weeks old}

The Gressman Family Blog....Spring Edition

You may have noticed that The Gressman Family blog has received yet another face lift. Well, it is time for the "spring edition" of our lovely little blog so it seemed altogether appropriate to ditch the deep and dramatic red for something a little lighter. Even though we are not experiencing exclusive spring weather as we are still getting a snow flurry or two I am at least in the spirit of things. After all, the month of May represents a very special occasion in our family - our baby girl is going to be one! Be sure to keep up with the Month of Kearyn series as we plan on celebrating our precious baby girl all month long.

If you want to catch up on all of the things that happened in our family last month then check out the April 2011 post.

We are sure that our spring is going to be as action packed as ever. There are bound to be struggles but there are going to be some great victories and special moments as well.

Thank you to all of those who continue to encourage me in my writing. Every time I go out and about I seem to run into several people who tell me that they have been keeping up with "the blog" and although I am pretty sure I blush every time I hear those words, it is an honor that you all are still hear reading and walking along this journey with me.

I know I have said it a hundred times but it is so overwhelming - especially when I see all of the different countries that have people visiting the blog and when I see nearly all 50 states represented as well. It is amazing and I am grateful to be apart of God's plan in all of this.

A Month of Kearyn.....Day 2 (Her Name)

One of the most common questions I get about our baby girl is how do we pronounce her name..... I can imagine some of you reading this now nodding your head in agreement wanting some clarification as well. So, here it goes. I could say something like "it is pronounced just as it is spelled" and that would be about as clear as mud but it really is pronounced as it is spelled. Here is a little further explanation though so you don't send me hate mail :-) Kearyn is pronounced K-Ear-In. The "ear" part in the middle is pronounced just like your ear you hear out of - hey that rhymed and it also rhymed with Kearyn :-) But that is easy enough, right?

{Kearyn Jaedance Gressman ~ 1 day old}

How did we decide on her name? Well, there is a reason why God only gave me one girl and I am pretty sure it is because if I were to have more than one the others would have remained nameless. I have a bazillion boys names that I like but if my three boys would have been girls I have no idea to this day what I would have named them. I am just not good with the whole girl naming thing I guess.

We also set ourselves up for an even bigger challenge (you know us Gressman's - we can't make it easy) and we didn't even do it on purpose but the boys' initails are C.J, K.J, C.J., and so Kearyn also had to fit in that pattern as the next K.J. I did tell dear hubby that since she was a girl we could start all over with a new rule. We could throw caution to the wind and live on the edge by naming her something that started with a letter besides "C" or "K"  but he used his veto card and said he really wanted her to have the initials K.J. So, after looking through thousands of "K" names the only name I liked was Kearyn. It actually came from the name Kiera which I really like but it is just too popular for my taste and the name Evelyn (my great-grandmother's middle name and a name I just love.) I later did find the name Kearyn spelled like Kieran but I obviously didn't like that spelling because I didn't use it. I feel like the "ea" is so much more femanine - maybe that is because there is the "ea" in my own name :-) - I don't know.

So, there you have it.....Kear (as in your ear, rhyming with hear) yn. It is not pronounced like Karen, Karin, Caryn, Carin, Caren or any other way you can spell the name Karen although I do know some lovely ladies  out there with that name who I would not mind if my daughter shared a name with. :-)

You might be wondering about her middle name but we will save that for another discussion. After all, we have another 29 posts to go.

A Reprieve

I truly feel like God has given me a reprieve from cancer this past week. I have felt really well the past few days - I am sure it isn't 100% but I don't even remember what 100% felt like before so that really doesn't matter right now.

I have enjoyed this week so much and really it is the little things. Easter Sunday was rough because I was just a few days past chemo but the fact that I got up at 6:30am and was able to get all four of my children ready for church by myself was definitely a miracle. I enjoyed the fact that I could do this on my own so much - it is really hard to explain. I enjoyed sitting at a track meet all day watching my son compete. I enjoyed sitting in the rain watching my other son play soccer - I didn't even care that I got wet! I was just so thankful to be able to do these things. My baby girl has been teething which has been very rough for her and yesterday the only way she would fall asleep was if I was holding her - I enjoyed every minute of this and I never thought once of all the other things I needed to do. I was so wonderful just to hold her and stare at her beautiful face.

The past few days I really haven't thought about my treatment that much at all. It was like God provided me with the necessary distractions both mentally and physically just to get away from it for a while. As a result I feel completely refreshed and I am not stressed out about going into treatment #7 in two days at all. I know what the drill is and I know it isn't going to be any different this time around. I will look like death warmed over (and feel like it too) for about 5 or 6 days and then I will start to perk up again. I will have a couple of mediocre days before I finally feel okay again. Felling okay is good. I don't need to feel spectacular or stellar - I am okay with okay.

I am thankful for the gifts that God has given me this past week. I truly feel as if He is just carrying me through all of this now. He is giving me the inspiration I need to press on and move forward as I need to. He is giving me the courage to hold my head high despite it all and He is loving me all the while. God is good..... all the time.

A Month of Kearyn.....Day 1

It is hard to believe that my baby girl is going to be ONE this month. On May 31, 2010 God blessed us with the sweetest and most precious baby girl that I could have ever asked for. She has changed each of us in such a significant way that it is painful to look back and even think of life without her. There was definitely a place in my heart that only she could fill and it was God's infinite wisdom who knew that and it was because of His divine love for us that he gave her to us to fill that void in our lives making our family complete. 

I have watched her with each of her brothers with awe and wonder. She has given them gifts that will bless not only each of them as individuals but also their future wives and children. She has taught them patients and a new kind of love. My rough and tough boys actually had to learn how to be gentle. A certain chivalry has come about each of them as they literally protect their baby sister at all cost. These are just a few things that I will talk about this month. Stay tuned to learn more about our baby girl and to help us celebrate our precious Kearyn.

April 2011

April 2011 was a busy month for us. Jason started the month off by having the privilege of marrying some dear friends of ours.....congratulations Ryan & Katy!

Two days later we had our own anniversary which was marked by a quiet dinner (minus 3 of the 4 children) which allowed for some wonderful time for conversation.

April also meant two more chemo treatments. During the 1st chemo treatment of the month (#5 in total) I was told that I would need 3 more treatments for sure. That of course is not news you want to hear but I had expected it. It was during my 6th treatment that I learned that I now would need 6 more treatments for a total of 12. This was pretty tough news for me but I desperately tried to look on the bright side - if I go the 12 treatments then I hopefully won't have to have radiation. The idea of radiation was one that both Jason and I were struggling with and had been praying for clarity on whether or not I should have it. So we were thankful that God really took that decision out of our hands and made it for us.

We also remembered our baby boy that we lost 2 years ago. This was a difficult time for me especially since I was going through my 6th chemo treatment at the same time but God got me through it. I am so grateful for the love and support of so many of my friends who reached out to me in that time with an encouraging word, a warm hug, or even a soothing gift. I know so many of you know my pain out there and I thank you so much for your comfort in my time of need. Thank you for all of those who are praying for me as well. It really means so much to me.

April also marked some great things for our kids. Our 5 year old son is now participating in soccer. This is his first team sport and it is exciting for him. In his very first game he scored his first goal. I was grateful to be able to be there to watch this happen for him. He is a very natural athlete but he takes after his dad and does not like to run so his preferred position is goaly. But he does a really good job playing forward - especially when he puts his mind to it.

Our oldest son participated in his first track meet in April as well. He took after his mama this year and ran distance. He ended up running the mile, the 400 meter, and the 800 meter at his track meet (the exact same races I use to run! :-) It was so exciting to watch him and he did so good! Again, I was thankful that I was able to be there to watch him.

Our three year old is as funny and dramatic as ever and the baby is now teething once again - which has not been fun in the least for any of us involved. I cannot wait until she gets this one in. It breaks my heart to see her in pain.

We also celebrated Easter this month. I was just a few days past chemo and usually I am not up and around until at least the Monday or Tuesday after my chemo treatments so I basically willed myself well enough to go and I am so thankful that I did. Our church puts on a giant Easter egg hunt which the kids really enjoyed and then just being able to be present in church on such a special day was wonderful. I was pretty wiped out the next couple of days because of it but it was worth it.

So, that was April 2011 in a nutshell. I am sure I am forgetting a few things so if I remember something significant later on I will post about it then. We are now on to May.....it is sure to be an exciting month!