My Heart Check Moment

Today I was just kind of feeling blah. It wasn't that it was a bad day, but I just felt unfocused and uninspired. My heart was definitely not in it. I wasn't going to even blog tonight because who wants a unfocused and uninspiring blog? No one. I wasn't excited to write and you wouldn't be excited to read. But something just kept tugging at my heart. Tug. Tug. Tug. You know that type when you just cannot let it go and you know you either do it now or you are going to do it at 2 a.m. Your choice. Some choice.

So, I started to think about what to write about in my unfocused and uninspired mood. Maybe I should finish one of the couple hundred blogs I have started and not finished. (No, I am not exaggerating. There are a bunch.) No. That didn't sound exciting.

I thought of going on Pinterest and finding something interesting to share with you there. Pinterest always inspires me. But no. That wasn't appropriate for tonight either. Finally, a thought. For this I was grateful.

{What was I doing a year ago today?} 

Well by golly, let's look back through the ol' blog. I knew this things was good for something. So, I tracked it down and boy... did I have a heart check moment or what! Of all the days. Of all the things I could be feeling today compared to what I was feeling one year ago today.

Well, here it is: {Day 22: Chemo 2} You can read it for yourself and I really encourage you to do so if you have time and the interest. It is complete with my very own {life scripture} which I don't blog about very often because my {life scripture} was given to me at a very painful time in my life.

So, as a rundown - one year ago today I am blogging from my chemo chair. I was going through my 2nd chemo treatment. Talk about being cut to the core with your very own words and even feeling disappointment in myself that I didn't cherish today more like I should have. You see, it isn't about me being inspired. It isn't about what I am going through. Just as I wrote about a year ago - it is about me seeing the opportunities to help and inspire others. And I came so very close to missing that today.

Yes, I know I am human. I am swiftly reminded of that each and every day that I fall so short of where I should be. But that is no longer an excuse I can use as a crutch. I have been sharply shown what the alternative could be. Yes, I am a believer and yes, I know that I will meet Jesus when my days are up here in this world. But not now. Not yet. Not with my children so young. No, I still have too much to do.

Thank you God for using the very words you gave ME one year ago today to get me focused and inspired once again. I will do my best not to let you down.

Oh, and to add insult to injury (LOL) - I actually blogged a part 2 on this day one year ago as well. Here it is: {Day 22: Chemo 2 Part 2.... My Inspiration} As the title indicates, it is on {inspiration} just in case you need a little of that today.

Blessings and Love,
Andrea