Day 45: Dinner and a Hair Cut.....{Part 2}

So, as I shared in the "Part 1", Friday was hair cut day. My long time friend, Pam, had offered as soon as she heard I was diagnosed to cut my hair for me, and continue to cut my hair as needed, through the chemo process. I tell you what, the hour I was in her chair was just so relaxing to me. We talked about all kinds of things.

I do have a prayer request for Pam and her husband. They started the process of an international adoption over 3 years ago and they are still waiting for their baby girl to come home. Please, please, please lift this family up in prayer. I know we have to trust God's timing in all of this but I know first hand the power of prayer. I know He can bring this baby girl home to her mommy and daddy who are here waiting.

The second prayer request I have for this family is financial support. Me being me, of course I had to ask Pam if she and her husband would be willing to adopt another baby in the meantime. (Hey I have four kids ;-)  In no way was I saying to give up on their little girl - but they have had a homestudy done every year for the past 3 years, their paperwork done countless times, they are this perfectly wonderful couple just waiting to fill their home with children and I know there are children out there waiting for a mommy and daddy.....it seems like such a tragedy to me that they don't have a child yet. She told me that they would be willing to adopt another child in addition to their baby girl but they have invested everything into their first baby girl.

I am determined when I am well and done with my chemo to help them get the financial means they need to bring a baby home. If you are reading this and have a heart to help the orphan and the families who want to bring them home, please email me. Our church has recently started a Faith In Action ministry that is trying to do just that and we can use your help. I know we, as the Body of Christ, can do this! If you have fundraising ideas - let me know.

Anyway, when my friend, Pam and I parted ways she said that she had asked God for the words to encourage me through this time in my life - like she hadn't already done enough - but then she reminded me of something from when I was in high school that brought back a ton of memories that I had actually not thought about in years. I use to run all of the time. Well, I actually played volleyball, basketball, and ran in track. Running wasn't my favorite of these three sports - basketball was hands down - but I like to win and so that kept me going in track. Basically I loved the race but didn't like the training so much. Most of my running career I suffered from severe shin splints. They were so bad at several points that I could barely walk. But I would go down early for practice every day, stick both of my legs in and ice bucket until my legs were numb, let the trainer tape my legs up to just below my knees, and then I would complete my workout. I pretty much did that for all 4 years of my high school running career. It was extremely painful pretty much all of the time. No wonder childbirth wasn't ever that bad for me.

So, God laid it on Pam's heart to remind me of my perseverance through that time. As I thought back on what I did every day I honestly can't tell you why I did it. I just knew that was I had to do to get the job done and so I did it. Kind of like me going through chemo now. I don't know how I really get through it but I know it is my job now to do it so I can be well again and so I do it. I am just so amazed how God taught me all these lessons throughout my life to prepare me for things like battling cancer. I am grateful for the heart He has given me. I am grateful for my fighting spirit, the endurance that He blessed me with. People use to think it was crazy that I was a distance runner and now I know why He did it. So, I could run the distance now.

I am grateful for my friend Pam and for her seeking God for the "perfect" message for me. Through her faithfulness and obedience I was truly blessed - and I got a cute hair cut. :-)

Love you all and wish you a very blessed day!

~Andrea

Day 45: Dinner and a Hair Cut.....{Part 1}

So yesterday, Friday, was way too eventful for one post so I am dividing it into 2.

I know many have been wondering if I have started losing my hair yet. Most people don't ask me and opt to ask my husband instead. The funny thing is that it actually bothers him more than it bothers me. I don't want anyone to feel bad if you are reading this and have asked my husband about my hair because, if you haven't noticed, my hubby is a pretty tough guy and he has the wonderful ability to let things go easily.

Back to my hair.... I have been losing my hair for a little while now. I haven't even really noticed that it has thinned that much because I really have a ton of hair. (Ironically this always annoyed me in the past but now seems to be a good thing, who knew.)  A couple of people have said they can see how it has thinned, and so maybe it has, but because I see it multiple times a day I don't notice it as much.

Anyway, the past week or so it has gotten worse and it was just time to get it cut. My friend, Pam, who I have known since I was like 10 (literally) had offered to cut it for me when I was first diagnosed. She has gone through this process with several other cancer patients and so she is totally aware of how this stuff progresses. I was relieved because that meant at least one of us knew. I find that I am all together clueless about a lot of this stuff and because there are so many different kinds of cancer out there - and subsequently that many different types of treatment - every situation is quite unique.

So, she cut my hair into a cute A-line. I am really happy with it as it will be a lot easier for me to take care of than my long hair. I am also always up for a change - change is good - at least when it come to my hair. I can tell you I will never ever never ever never ever be one of those that has the same hairdo for 2 decades. (Yes, I meant to use that many "never ever's".) I just get bored too quickly with things to let that happen. I hear so many people say that they "look good" with that particular hairstyle. Well, how do you know that you won't look even better with another hairstyle until you try it? And after all, it is only hair and it will grow back. At least mine always has.

The hair loss is a big deal for some and I don't really know why it isn't for me. It just isn't though. I do have my suspicions on why.  I think it comes down to my perspective. As I have said before, losing my hair is such a small price to pay in order to get to see my kids grow up. Really it is and I can't speak for everyone out there but I think if you were given that choice - lose your hair and get to see your children grow up or keep your hair and don't - I am pretty sure you would say goodbye to your hair in a heartbeat, at least I know I would.

Also, I don't fear change. I know for me personally when fear begins to creep in it is because of the unknown but that is very different than change for me. An example of an unknown that I have feared before was like when I didn't know how far the cancer had spread through my body but then God gave me a peace that He was in control of that "unknown" and it didn't need to be feared any longer and so I didn't.

But I have never feared change. That is probably why I didn't mind moving around the country like we did. I just viewed it as an adventure. Getting my hair cut is like a scaled down version of that. You get the change without the packing Which is great because I hate packing. Anyway, if you get a hair cut what is the worst that can happen? You don't like it for a couple of months until it grows out. In the scope of life that is pretty small.

I also have my suspicions on why it bothers those around me so much that I am losing my hair - such as my tough guy husband. It bothers others because it is one of the few things that they can see that represents what the reality of the situation is. No one knows how bad I feel physically. Jason gets to witness this the most obviously, but he still doesn't know fully. I try to put it into words for him so he can have an idea every once in a while - like you know when you had your ingrown toe removed, well imagine having that done over and over again for about a week straight - or something like that. He then cringes in agony but he never really knows because he isn't the one going through it. Not that I would ever want him too but my point is that he sees my hair falling out and it is a visual for him of how bad the situation really is. Or maybe he just really liked my hair, I don't know. I am just talking out loud here.

I have felt so blessed to have all of you in my life who have encouraged me through this and tell me how cute my hair looks. That is definitely what I need to hear instead of  something like....Wow, you got a hair cut.......and she sure did cut it didn't she....wow, looky there....it sure is short...  Yeah, that just tends to be discouraging. Thankfully no one has reacted like that yet, at least not in words. I am sure there were a few thinking it. You know who you are. :-) Just kidding.

Anyway, I will blog tomorrow more about this day as it is getting late now. I wish you all a very blessed day.

~Andrea