A Reprieve

I truly feel like God has given me a reprieve from cancer this past week. I have felt really well the past few days - I am sure it isn't 100% but I don't even remember what 100% felt like before so that really doesn't matter right now.

I have enjoyed this week so much and really it is the little things. Easter Sunday was rough because I was just a few days past chemo but the fact that I got up at 6:30am and was able to get all four of my children ready for church by myself was definitely a miracle. I enjoyed the fact that I could do this on my own so much - it is really hard to explain. I enjoyed sitting at a track meet all day watching my son compete. I enjoyed sitting in the rain watching my other son play soccer - I didn't even care that I got wet! I was just so thankful to be able to do these things. My baby girl has been teething which has been very rough for her and yesterday the only way she would fall asleep was if I was holding her - I enjoyed every minute of this and I never thought once of all the other things I needed to do. I was so wonderful just to hold her and stare at her beautiful face.

The past few days I really haven't thought about my treatment that much at all. It was like God provided me with the necessary distractions both mentally and physically just to get away from it for a while. As a result I feel completely refreshed and I am not stressed out about going into treatment #7 in two days at all. I know what the drill is and I know it isn't going to be any different this time around. I will look like death warmed over (and feel like it too) for about 5 or 6 days and then I will start to perk up again. I will have a couple of mediocre days before I finally feel okay again. Felling okay is good. I don't need to feel spectacular or stellar - I am okay with okay.

I am thankful for the gifts that God has given me this past week. I truly feel as if He is just carrying me through all of this now. He is giving me the inspiration I need to press on and move forward as I need to. He is giving me the courage to hold my head high despite it all and He is loving me all the while. God is good..... all the time.